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Revenge is a dish best served well cooked and ironic.
Batman and I decided after sitting in my Fish smelling car for several days, after several thorough cleanings inside by both us and the professionals, that we shouldn’t let this prank stand unchallenged.
This was war and we don’t lose!
The Sarge gave us a tip while we were heading into work that day. He said to us, “Hey listen, the New Guys vehicle got back from the body shop and its sitting out by the shop, unlocked.”
The New guy had an accident a while ago and his car was back, without his knowledge, the perfect time to strike!
So, while on patrol Batman and I stopped at the local Bait and Tackle shop.
Now, being smarter then the average bear, we figured we’d skip the middle man and just get to the guts of the prank.
Batman said to the worker in the store, “We need about… a pound of Chum”.
Chum, is basically everything left that you “can’t” eat of a Fish. All of the gross smelly most nasty parts of the fish are ground up into a paste and put in frozen storage for bait use.
The man brought us a frozen pound of Chum, cost us $7.00 for the block.
This thing smelled so bad we bagged it 5 times and it still seeped through..
Arriving at the station we located the New guys car in the parking lot and sure enough, it was most definitely unlocked and waiting for sweet revenge.
We took the block of Chum out and put it on the floor next to his open car doors, debating where to put it.
First, I shaved the top off into ‘scraps’ and threw bits of it into each air vent. Then we just tossed the entire brick under the back seat of the car since it was still a frozen solid brick.
About 4 hours later we decided that we REALLY needed to get him back since our car still smelled like rotten fish and he went above and beyond our initial prank.
When we went to grab the Chum block under the back seat it had most definitely thawed. It was now a gooey chunk of pure nasty fish.
Batman started putting it under the floor mats, seats, head liner, interior lights and other fun places while I went to work on the engine bay. I placed large chunks on the vents which lead into the cabin for the AC, some on the manifold and some on the handle to open the engines hood.
Laughing like school kids we ran back to our car and speed off.
This was on Friday and it was now Sunday. A full 3 days of baking in the sun we expected the New guy to call us yelling any minute.
He never called.
We started to feel guilty so we called him several times, each time he didn’t pickup.
Finally, arriving at work on Sunday afternoon Batman and I decided to ‘check’ the car out.
It was still sitting exactly how we left it. Opening the door we were hit with a toxic wave of death that was so foul it took everything in me not to throw up.
We went upstairs to turn in some paperwork at the station when we saw the New guy talking to Sarge.
I walked up to the New guy, “Hey man, we tried calling you. We felt bad about getting you back. You might want to go get your car cleaned before the smell of fish gets any worse then it already is man”.
The New guy looked at me and then looked at Batman. He said, “My car? No man, that car got Reassigned to Batman on Thursday since his car is still in the shop”.
I looked at Batman and almost peed myself laughing so hard. He turned dark shades of purple and then we looked at Sarge who gave us Doe eyes.
Long story short, we basically got tricked into… pranking ourselves.
Sarge is now on the list for destruction. We’ll get him the last day before we ‘transfer’ to our new district.
Although his might be so bad they’ll need to scrap the car.
- UPDATE ***
Our Sarge left his car running while he went in the station to do some paper work.
We cranked his AC’s heat to FULL, set the air to MAX and the Blower to MAX, then removed all of the nobs so he couldn’t turn it off or down.
He was sweating like a pig the last time we saw him.
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