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You have to love chickens.
BEEEPPPPPPP! ATTENTION ALL UNITS! BURGLARY IN PROGRESS!
That was the first thing I heard checking into service last night at 2100 hours (9PM)
I of course was given the call. Dispatch stated there were two subjects wearing all black in her back yard breaking into her shed.
I arrived moments after the call went out. I stopped my patrol vehicle a house away from the ‘burglarized’ house and peeked my head around a fence from the street to get a better view of the backyard.
I saw both subjects. I was about to get on the air to advise what I had and to start a perimeter when one of them saw me and both took off running.
I, in the same fashion, proceeded to run after them.
From the street I hopped the first fence leading into the backyard. One subject continued running north over a fence and into another backyard and the other went west through the alley way they were standing in. Running at full speed I cleared the backyard in seconds in attempts to get to the backyard the bigger one was currently running through.
Fence number two was jumped with only my hands. I landed in a 4 foot wide alley with extremely heavy brush. One foot hitting the ground I was still in full stride….
…. when my other foot trying to maintain my speed hit something at the knee.
The first thing to slam into the ground was my chest, shortly followed by head and to complete the picture, my legs were stuck about 2 feet off the ground hanging over my head.
I looked like a giant letter ‘C’.
The chicken wire fence that had foiled my capture was merely 2 feet high.
No time to be disoriented, I got on the air.
“One Subject is running north bound, the other one is headed west through heavy brush, I need a perimeter 2×2 blocks from my location”
Just then my partner arrived on the wrong street. He happened to have thought the dispatcher said Terrace and not Street so he arrived exactly one block north of where I arrived just in time to catch the first subject.
One down.
Without dusting myself off I got up and started a single search pattern through the now five foot tall brush for subject number two.
Just then several specialized units showed up and helped me get the second subject, who had managed to get two houses west but not away from us.
Heading back to my car after getting the second one in custody, an Officer said to me, “Hey, what the hell happened to your uniform?”
I looked down, my pants had rips in them 4 inches long from the chicken wire fence and my shirt was covered in dirt that looked like it enjoyed its new home.
I replied with, “Well, laundry detergent is expensive so I wear em out as long as I can”.
He looked at me oddly for a second. Then walked away.
Some people just don’t have any sense of humor.
So after settling the situation I found out my two upstanding individuals were both too young to know how to clean themselves right, let alone be in high school.
My night was pretty shot after that. My back and legs still hurt from the full speed fall, but I’m used to that sort of pain by now.
Tonight is Super Bowl night and I’m working in the district its being held at.
Lord have mercy.
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